‘Someone once described the use of blindfolds to me as “BDSM-lite” and claimed that since everyone has tried them at least once, he doesn’t even really classify them as “kinky” play. Would you agree with that? Why or why not?’
‘BDSM-lite’? Yeah, I disagree. This humble little item has an awful lot of power over me.
It doesn’t leave physical marks.
It doesn’t cause pain.
It doesn’t make a noise.
But each time it’s used I’m completely in its thrall, because it puts me totally and utterly into the hands of the person who’s placed it over my eyes.
Without sight, I cannot move freely.
Without sight, I cannot see what is coming.
Without sight, all my other senses become more acute; taste, touch, smell.
Without sight, I am infinitely more vulnerable.
Without sight, the level of trust I have in my partner deepens because he becomes my eyes.
Is that sound I can hear him getting out a feather? Or is it him picking up the crop? He hasn’t moved or said anything for what seems like forever – is he standing watching me, an implement ready in his hand, or merely sitting reading a book? Psychologically, the blindfold has the ability to place the wearer in some very interesting places and gives the person Topping them the golden opportunity to play with their head. La Crimson Femme did a wonderful write-up on a class she attended a while back, The Sensual Sadist, conducted by a Dom named Haven (he has a great blog, Kinky As I Am, by the way) and shared an example of how a blindfold can be used to devastating effect:
Haven confessed to a love of mindfucking his sub with the senses. When a person is blindfolded, it is not always easy to tell the difference between hot and cold. He sometimes tells her he’s going to burn her and he sticks an iced implement on her instead.
One of the most unsettling but satisfying blindfold experiences I have had involved being blinded, stripped, and ‘walked’ over an un-even surface. Even though I knew roughly where we were going, I had to absolutely trust that he wasn’t going to let me fall, trip or bang into anything. And when we eventually came to a halt, I had no idea what lay in store for me. I’m curious by nature, and (ironically) like to run the show when I am not playing. Taking away my ability to determine – or at least make an educated guess – as to the course a session might take is a very, very effective way for him to exert control and get me off balance.
BDSM-lite? No. I believe that this simple scrap of material allows for a kaleidoscope of sensual and erotic possibilities.
Beautifully said, and I wholeheartedly agree, it is such an amazingly sensual experience
Thank you! x
I think the reason believe the ‘BDSM lite’ thing is down to lack of imagination to be honest, alone it is just a scrap of cloth but when combined with a whole host of other things it becomes an extremely powerful and sexy tool.
Mollyxxx
Yes, I’d agree. If a blindfold is just tied on and it’s ‘business as usual’, then it’s unlikely to do much at all. Thoughtful and considered use. That’s the key, I think.
You have explained perfectly just why blindfolds should not be considered as bdsm-lite
Rebel xox
Thank you, lovely. I really enjoyed reading your Blindfolds entry, too. x
“BDSM-lite? No. I believe that this simple scrap of material allows for a kaleidoscope of sensual and erotic possibilities.”
This right here is so beautiful!! Great post.
Absolutely!!
I love considering the possibilities as I wait for what He plans to do to me… the mindplay is just as much a part of what we do as the actual physical stimulation
~Kazi xxx
I really loved how you enumerated each of the aspects of how blindfolds come into play within a scene. One of the things I love most about participating in this weekly meme is all the wonderfully written blogs I am becoming acquainted with. Yours is no exception and I will of course be following. Thanks for a very nice read.
I agree with all of this. Being unable to see is always a real game changer for things.
Wonderful post, and I so agree! There is such a host of possibilities with blindfolds, so many ways to use it and have it used…truly a “kaleidoscope” of possibilities.
Couldn’t agree more! I often hear blindfolds referred to as “Vanilla”. I think they’re a brilliant little tool to have in your box ; )