Words have a lot of power. They can move us to tears, make us laugh, shock the hell out of us, make us happy. They can also turn us on.

Lately, I’ve noticed that increasing numbers of female erotica and erotic romance writers are using flowery euphemisms less and what we would traditionally have considered ‘baser’, masculine terms more. We all have different tastes, obviously, but I’m curious to know whether our comfort levels as female readers are changing. In text, are we now more able to embrace words that, say, five or ten years ago had the power to shock us? And do they invoke feelings of arousal or have we simply become desensitised by the rise in their use?

The feminist Germain Greer said in the BBC’s Balderdash and Piffle series, which originally aired back in 2006, that the word ‘cunt’ was ‘one of the few remaining words in the English language with a genuine power to shock.’ Is this still true six years down the line? (I did consider titling this post ‘Cunt: when is it appropriate?’ but decided that the word, when used blatantly and without context, would likely be a barrier to people reading any further into this piece. Which tells me straight away that I, personally, have attached some degree of stigma to it even though I consider myself fairly comfortable with ‘cunt’ in the context of erotic writing.) I also have to wonder if the success of E.L. James’ Fifty Shades of Grey is due to its rather chaste language. Sure, we get some non-vanilla toys and some alternative sex practices, but how many times do we get to hear about Anastasia’s ‘down there’ during the course of the story? I’m not saying that you have to use crude words to write good sexual content – look at John Cleland’s Fanny Hill – but do we, as women, have a fear of using certain words in the bedroom?

Time for a rather unscientific experiment.

I asked some well-read ladies of different ages and degrees of shockability to give me their reactions to some raw words in an erotic context. For reference, I’ve included both the Oxford Dictionary definition for each, plus some short excerpts from popular erotic books, written by female authors. Their different takes on the words – and their respective ‘smut comfort levels’ – are  extremely interesting.

 

pussy

noun (plural pussies)

vulgar slang a woman’s genitals.

•          [mass noun] women in general, considered sexually.

 

‘His voice was a demanding, low rumble. He tightened his hands in her hair, and her pussy clenched from the sensation of being controlled, used.’

- Owning Wednesday by Annabel Joseph

 

 

 

Kiki: A couple of circling butterflies down below. I don’t mind the word pussy at all. It’s playful, self-descriptive, non-offensive.

LongSkirt: The first word (sorry I can’t repeat it even in type). Literally shaking, I think that is without a doubt the worst of all words for me.

MissR: There’s something of the schoolyard in this little term, with its faux innocence. It reminds me of early boyfriends testing the boundaries of describers. It is also largely 80s in my mind; I think of thinly veiled song lyrics and their desperation to be raunchy and still avoid a censor. Meaning this passage gives me the giggles, not the wiggles.

Romilly: This is a good word for erotic fiction – a great slang word for ‘down there’. Pussy is so much sexier than using the technical terms and gets straight to the point and the action, unlike the flowery descriptions you sometimes come across.

Poseyfossil: Bleurgh. A hissing noise has never been sexy. The double ‘s’ sound is cold and utterly un-arousing, sticks in your teeth and carries a strong risk of unintentional spitting. For try-hards and parody only.

 

fuck

verb

[with object]

have sexual intercourse with (someone).

• [no object] (of two people) have sexual intercourse.

 

noun

an act of sexual intercourse.

• [with adjective] a sexual partner of a specified ability.

Origin: early 16th century: of Germanic origin (compare Swedish dialect focka and Dutch dialect fokkelen); possibly from an Indo-European root meaning ‘strike’, shared by Latin pugnus ‘fist’.

 

‘While I’m getting ready,’ the man said, unbuckling his belt, ‘why don’t you have a little play with yourself? Get in the mood? I want you to be nice and wet when I fuck you.’

The Business of Pleasure – Justine Elyot

 

 

Kiki: Love the word ‘fuck’. It’s classic and still holds punch with me. I don’t find it offensive and, in the context of erotica, it gets the juices flowing.

LongSkirt: This word doesn’t bother me but I don’t like it in the context of sex at all. I blushed when I read the extract from The Business of Pleasure and I swear was also fanning myself a little like a cliché from a Victorian novel.

MissR: This, for me, is the baseline of literature. It’s just sex, a bit too masculine and, quite frankly, a bit boring. It is supposedly unromantic, and always used that way. However, when I picture the subtle throws of bedroom antics as portrayed in the traditional missionary position of ‘making love’, I think being fucked sounds more accurate. I just never see it described that way, so leaves me mid eye-roll.

Romilly: Yes, it is a vulgar word, but not a shocking as the ‘C’ word. I like the word in erotic fiction as it describes the base act, the pure animal pleasure. Not everyone ‘makes love’ every time…

Poseyfossil: I love the word ‘fuck’. Like most four-letter words, its impact lies in its brevity and, for me, the clincher is the fabulous ‘ck’ ending which catches the back of your throat, almost as if it knows what is to come….

 

cunt

noun

vulgar slang

a woman’s genitals.

Origin: Middle English: of Germanic origin; related to Norwegian and Swedish dialect kunta, and Middle Low German, Middle Dutch, and Danish dialect kunte.

 

‘She shivered as he teased over the creases between her cunt and thighs. With her pussy stuffed full and her legs splayed, her clit was beautifully exposed—a fat, glistening pink pearl.’

My Leige of Dark Haven – Cherise Sinclair

 

 

Kiki: Hate it. It’s used, in my opinion, by misogynists. Have no idea why women now adopt the term. It’s foul. Scares me more than excites me.

LongSkirt: The third word (also unable to repeat). Tapping feet and waving hands about (possibly squeaking a little). When I read the extract I think I theatrically gasped then quickly exited lest anyone see what I was reading!

MissR: As someone who is easily distracted by metaphor, I had to reread this passage to find the ‘c word’ in there. And I do generally refer to it as the ‘c word’, but I do that for my friends, rather than for my own sensibilities. I mean, I’ve said ‘cunt’ quite a few times – and mostly at an inopportune moment. The thing about it is that people make you into a bit of a villain for it, but for me it’s the best most empowering term we have.

Romilly: Hmmm… not comfortable with this at all. I don’t find it sexy, just crass, and I don’t like it to see it written or hear it spoken.

Poseyfossil: There is something fabulously pagan about ‘cunt’. It says earthy woman of the forest who’ll brew you something potent before riding you round her mud hut wearing antlers. Sadly misappropriated as both an insult and something to be offended by, mostly by people who would balk at wearing antlers in bed.

 

cock

noun

vulgar slang a man’s penis

 

‘With his hands clamped on her thighs, and his still-erect cock sticking out of his open fly, he went down on her with a furious tongue, lashing at her, penetrating her, taking what he’d just had.’

Lover Reborn (Black Dagger Brotherhood Series, Book 10) – J.R. Ward

 

 

Kiki: Another classic term for me, it appeals to my 80s bleach blonde/tan/jock curiosity. A small stirring from this word.

LongSkirt: This doesn’t embarrass me at all really but it still isn’t a word I would use in a sexual context.

MissR: This is a timid old word for me. It’s almost polite really. It’s so common, and slips quietly into conversation, the mouse of the world confident to utter it as derogatory. The passage gives it punch here, with an enthusiasm and drive I that I don’t normally assign to it.  Bravo!

Romilly: Again, very comfortable with this term in erotic fiction as it bypasses the flowery descriptions, which are not necessary. As you read the word, your imagination paints the picture.

Poseyfossil: Tricky to type that you love cock and not risk losing the attention of the reader to the rest of your sentence but, like its bedtime story companions ‘suck’ and ‘fuck’, ‘cock’ is short and sweet. By uttering the letters, the shape of your mouth and throat becomes primed for fellatio. And if you don’t like someone, it’s very easy to utter this under your breath and fake a coughing fit should you suspect you’ve been overheard.

 

A very mixed bag of reactions, to say the least. So, where do you stand on the most infamous of English words?

 

 

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