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Houdini Showing How To Escape HandcuffsIf you tell someone that you found some handcuffs in your friend Bill’s sock drawer (why were you snooping in there in the first place?!) or that you discovered a set in the glovebox of Granny Betsy’s car, it’s highly likely that you’ll see an eyebrow raised into a hairline and an appreciative-slash-knowing smirk rather than a look of horror at the news. Because handcuffs, it seems, are by and large okay with the mainstream.

I must confess, I am intrigued by this thinking. What is it about them that makes them so palatable to so many? Do they denote an ‘acceptable’ (and please don’t for one minute interpret my use of that word here as symbolising my own personal views on what is and isn’t acceptable between two consenting adults) brand of kink? One that it is ‘okay’ to indulge in? Most people seem to think nothing of a little restraint in the bedroom – bondage by any other name would feel as sweet – even if they don’t identify as kinky. But I suspect the reaction you’d get from a vanilla individual coming across a cane or a vampire glove amongst your personal items would be rather different. (Double-take and a step backwards rather than a blasé smirk?) I wonder if it’s because handcuffs don’t, generally speaking, involve any sort of pain on the wearer’s part and are thus far less confrontational than other forms of kink, which may have some sort of marked sensation component attached to them? Continue reading

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Another brilliant edition of e[lust]. Even if you don’t have time to read the whole digest, please do check out the top three posts, as voted for by the e[lust] judges, Molly’s picks, and the brilliant article by K. D. Grace on the regulation of our fantasies, which scooped this month’s Sexbytes Readers’ Choice award.

rose Photo courtesy of Sex with Rose

Welcome to e[lust] - The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at e[lust]. Want to be included in e[lust] #56? Start with the rules, come back March 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

Why I Post Nude Photos (and blog about sex)
Discovering Myself Through My Strap-On
Sex Toy Shaming and Bigoted Wise Cracks, FTW!

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Aftercare and BDSM Play
Two worlds

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

Continue reading

10

At the end of last year Tamsin Flowers – friend, erotica author and all round groovy lady – was kind enough to invite me to participate in her Superotica advent calendar: a smorgasbord of sexy story excerpts from a variety of different writers, designed to raise the old blood pressure (in a good way) in the lead-up to Christmas. I was unable to promote it on Chintz at the time, what with my move abroad, but I’m doing so now, festive season or no festive season, because it’s absolutely worth checking out if you’re into hot ‘n’ dirty reads; the quality of the calendar is excellent and the authors involved, including Alison Tyler and Justine Elyot, top-notch.

Anyway, brave lady that she is, Tamsin chose to include a snippet from an unpublished story of mine, Dark, in her line-up. Centred around erotic humiliation, it’s a tale I’ve had kicking about on my hard drive for a while now (I’m hoping to find a home for it in an anthology and am thus holding onto the full version with a death grip) but, as we head towards Valentine’s Day, I thought you were all deserving of a smutty little morsel to get you past the cheesy hearts and flowers currently coming at us from all sides. And it’s been a while since I posted some of my own stuff on Chintz.

I hope you enjoy this little taster of Dark; I’ll let you know if and when it finds a place beyond my laptop so that you can read it in its entirety.

Jane
xxx

PS – Tamsin’s up to yet more mischief with Superotica Valentine posts; she’s currently on Day 9, so hurry on over and catch your smutty selves up! Continue reading

05

At Any Price (Gaming the System)Title: At Any Price (Gaming the System)
Author: Brenna Aubrey
Publisher: Silver Griffon Associates (13 January 2014)
ISBN: 9781940951010
Reviewer: Jane

A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away, I used to work in the videogame industry. I won’t go into detail, but suffice to say, when At Any Price (Gaming the System) came to my attention earlier in the week via a link in this post by Skye Warren, I was immediately intrigued. My mind began to whir. Was the heroine going to get ‘serviced’ next to the servers? Would the hero decide to ‘review her build’ during the daily Scrum meeting? In my experience, game dev. is a whole load of (stressful) fun, but calling it sexy would be … a stretch, to say the least. Unless you count listening to hundreds of emote .wav files to make sure they don’t sound unintentionally orgasmic, getting shot (repeatedly) with Nerf guns when you tell the dev. team they need to fix a bug the night before manufacturer submission, asking the rigger to make a character’s boobs smaller, and informing the lead artist that the creature he’s spent the last few days concepting needs to look ‘less penis-like’.

However, it turns out that the videogame backdrop for At Any Price (the first in a series of three books by author Brenna Aubrey) is more peripheral than integral, despite the references to patches, servers and avatars. It’s true that Adam, the hero, can code like a god (apparently, he’s the Zeus of C++) but it’s his addiction to his mobile and laptop, rather than his association with MMORPG (massively multiplayer online role-playing) game development, that ultimately define him in Ms Aubrey’s story. Continue reading

03

Hello? Anyone there?

Like Lazarus rising from the dead (although granted, in this case, the resurrection has taken a lot longer than four days), I’m finally (finally!) back on the laptop and twitching the florals. Woot! It’s been pretty damn frustrating not being able to blog and ramble as normal but I suspect it’s been far more so for those of you who’ve continued to visit Chintz over the past two-and-a-half months in the hope of finding a new post. So inappropriate hugs and kisses to everyone who’s stuck with me and offered their support as I’ve moved from one side of the world to the other; it’s been a long slog but at long last I have a reliable Internet connection and an actual house to live in. Largess.

I’ve decided to kick off my new (albeit slightly delayed) blogging year with an Alert Me. Given that I’ve been offline so much recently, it feels like there are about a billion news stories and articles that have passed me by, so in a lot of ways this round-up is as much for me as it is for you. Enjoy.

 

In Which I Explain Why I Turned Down a Three-book New York Print Deal to Self-publish
Source: Brenna Aubrey (via One Handed Writers)

At Any Price (Gaming the System)This piece by Brenna Aubrey makes for fascinating reading. If you’re a self-published or aspiring author, then I strongly encourage you to swing by her Website and cast a beady eye over it. Not least because it gives an excellent breakdown of some key contractual clauses that writers will come across when presented with book deals drawn up by traditional publishers. Pay careful attention, people, to the Non Compete clause. This is a bloody important bit of legal jargon. And can I add that any new author who has the guts and strength of character to turn down a six-figure deal in order to stay true to her own personal writing goals and aspirations has my undying admiration. On the strength of this post of Brenna’s, I’ve now downloaded the book in question, At Any Price (Gaming The System). I’ll let you know how I get on with it; stick figures may be on the horizon. Continue reading

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*A massive ‘thank you’ to everyone who voted my Pain Positive and Sex toy manuals: puppies, kittens and a whole lot of nonsensical fluff as top picks for this month’s edition of e[lust], and an even bigger one to the wonderful people who made the former article possible – Molly (Molly’s Daily Kiss@Mollysdailykiss), DomSigns (@DomSigns), Trent Evans (Trent Evans Letters@TrentEvansTales) and M. They, without doubt, deserve the lion’s share of the credit.

 

potter Photo courtesy of Property of Potter

Welcome to e[lust] - The only place where the smartest and hottest sex bloggers are featured under one roof every month. Whether you’re looking for sex journalism, erotic writing, relationship advice or kinky discussions it’ll be here at e[lust]. Want to be included in e[lust] #52? Start with the newly updated rules, come back November 1st to submit something and subscribe to the RSS feed for updates!

 

~ This Month’s Top Three Posts ~

 

7 (Random!) Suggestions for Dominant Types!

Pain Positive

i know what you are.

 

 

~ Featured Post (Molly’s Picks) ~

Golden Girl

Have You Met Larry

 

~ Readers Choice from Sexbytes ~

*You really should consider adding your popular posts here too*

Continue reading

04

Pain Positive

“Pain is an unpleasant sensory and emotional experience associated with actual or potential tissue damage, or described in terms of such damage.”

– International Association for the Study of Pain

 

As a sensation in general, pain (understandably) gets a bad wrap. If we accept the above definition, it’s the body’s way of letting us know that we’re doing something to it that it would rather we didn’t.

But, for some, feeling and/or inflicting pain isn’t always a negative experience. What about those of us who have a positive, healthy relationship with it? Who consider it to be an intrinsic part of our sexual selves and a consensual, loving relationship?

I have been trying to write this post for a while but it has proven to be rather difficult. Mainly because I’m not confident that I can fully articulate the nuances of erotic pain, it subtleties – its beauty – in any sort of way that will do it justice. Not to mention that I am fighting against the ridiculously outdated perceptions of sexual/erotic pain put forward in the late 1800s and early Twentieth Century by two well-known psychiatrists. (Yep, we’re still defining sadism and masochism according to theories that are now over 100 years old. How’s that for progress?)

So I’ve called in help – big time – in the form of four very awesome people, all of whom, like me, have a close relationship with sexual pain and view it rather differently to Richard von Krafft-Ebing and Sigmund Freud

 

THE RECEIVING END

Molly

That first touch of his hand or the flogger or the paddle is always a shock that makes me gasp for breath and often, for a split second, a little glimmer of hate for this moment will niggle at my brain. ‘Ow that hurts’ my knee jerk reaction but only for a moment. The smallest of moments, because then it is replaced with a heat, a strong powerful surge of chemicals that flood my nervous system but all too soon they begin to wane, disappearing alone my nerve endings and fluttering away to almost nothing until the next strike and then the next and onwards. My body greedily lapping up the sensation, riding on an ever building wave of heat and pressure making my muscles twitch and my skin throb. Nothing else exists in this moment, the pain (for want of a better word) is a consuming focusing point that dances through my body, emptying my mind of everything and making me feel. Everything is more when there is pain and yet everything is me. I am the centre of myself or should I say my body is. Alight with heat, hot electric pulsing heat that fills me up and consumes me, washing everything else away. I am raw, exposed, vulnerable and yet invincible. In that moment I feel so truly alive. Continue reading

01

Last week, I saw this tweet by blogger and writer Betty Herbert

@BettyHerbert

… and had something of a ‘heck, yeah!’ moment. Mainly because Betty had managed to articulate in less than 140 characters something that has been bugging me for a long time: sex toy manufacturers’ use of annoyingly euphemistic language within their instruction manuals. Or, put another way, their ridiculous insistence on providing virtually no practical instruction whatsoever when it comes to anything other than nuts and bolts functionality.

When I questioned her further about her tweet, Betty went on to say:

@BettyHerbert(2)

If you own a vibrator, or a dildo, or a cock ring, or a butt plug, or any other kind of sex toy or implement, you’ll likely understand exactly what it is she and I are talking about. How many times have you taken something out of the box, perused the manual, and gotten a run-down on Button A and Button B but nothing whatsoever about how or where to insert it? Looked at something online, twisted your head sideways and thought ‘how the hell does that work?’ Turned something over and over in your hands and, after scratching the old noggin, thought ‘well, I get the basic idea, but is this the front or the back?’ Granted, most of us can work out where to stick a dildo or a vibrator but as toy designs evolve and change, become more sophisticated, it’s not always as simple as it might seem to navigate the parameters of functionality. Continue reading

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It took me a few attempts to get this picture – mainly because I had the camera balanced on a swivel office chair, a box, and a folded jumper. Oh, and then there was the small matter of me hitting the timer and dashing onto the bed. (I’m all about the professionalism, no?) Anyway, I hope you like the resulting image; my OH has asked me to call this one ‘Waiting’. Why? Well, I think you can all figure that one out …

Waiting

Continue reading