I’m not sure that this photograph is particularly good from a technical perspective – the focus is a little bit out – but I kind of like it. I think it’s because I’m able to see the inside of the cane: the rattan’s structure and the way the tubular fibres sit so snugly next to one another. Looking at them like this, in cross section, it’s hard to believe they could pack much of a punch – ye gads do they ever, though! Continue reading
What we used: Silver Swan vibrator
From: Swan
Price: from £89.95 (varies by retailer)
Material(s): Phthalate-free seamless silicone
Reviewer: The Dairy Maid
The Dairy Maid doesn’t usually go in for pink things; she’s not really a girly-girl. But then she met the Silver Swan vibrator. And, well … I think it’s safe to say she really (really) liked it.
First impressions
The packaging
Very well packaged. There’s a smart, rectangular outer box with an accurate picture of the product on the front that gives the Silver Swan a high quality, contemporary feel and within, a hardened cardboard case with a magnetic closure. Once opened, this reveals a black card insert containing a comprehensive instruction booklet that lifts to reveal the vibrator itself, a satin carry pouch, and a multi-plug adaptor for recharging.
All in all, the packaging gives the impression of an expensive, high-end product – so far, so good! Continue reading
In today’s Alert Me: Sixty-Two Shades of Papacy, Amazon’s ‘second-hand’ eBooks patent, and creepy sex toy security.
Who Said It: The Pope or Fifty Shades of Grey?
Source: Hollywood (Beta)
Who knew that Pope Benedict XVI and E.L. James had so much in common? As Aly Semigran points out in this article, the former’s new sixty-two page digital scrapbook features names and passages that are spookily similar to the great grey monolith.
We jokingly speculated during Remittance Girl’s Eroticon 2013 Creative Writing seminar that our conference was the final straw for the Pope, our debauchery the reason for him quitting his post (the chatter even spawned the awesome @HuggyPope Twitter account). But I’m beginning to think we were onto something. Except perhaps he’s, you know, really left to pursue his burgeoning erotic writing career under the pen name ‘E.L. James’ … Continue reading
Anyone?
Foil-encased condoms always remind me of After Eight chocolates (or fancy herbal teabags) and these Mates Skyns in particular, with their dark backgrounds and gold lettering, are remarkably similar to this iconic Seventies dinner-party staple. You could very easily slip some into a box and offer them round to your guests after pudding … You know, just to keep the conversation interesting … (Hey, Lizzie’s oral sex mints came out in this context and it certainly created some chatter!) Continue reading
How could I not do a Valentine’s shot this week?
This pic is of the Evolved Silicone Bendable Rose Vibrator, which the very lovely Donna from Vibrator Kingdom sent me as a Valentine’s gift. (Donna, you rock. x) I’m so, so tempted to leave it in the vase for a day or two and see if anyone works out what it is …
A little game to end. Can anyone can tell me (without using Google or any other search engine!) the name of the author responsible for the quote ‘A rose is a rose is a rose’? The prize? Bragging rights and general kudos. And I promise to bow (virtually) to you. If you can name the book, too? I will actually prostrate myself.
Consider the gauntlet thrown down! Continue reading
Some of you may have seen my post from Sunday commemorating my ex-colleague and friend, Steve, who passed away last week as a result of cancer. Needless to say, it was a very sad and emotional weekend.
But, thanks to a package that arrived at my door, I finally managed to crack a much-needed grin. Four Smile Makers fantasy man vibrators rode to my rescue, their cuteness and hilarious on-pack copy sending me into a much-needed fit of giggles. Continue reading
Image: Lupa – Julo (own work)
Since July of last year:
As I’ve added more and more reviews and articles to Chintz, I’ve become increasingly aware that it’s more difficult for visitors to find what they want quickly. Chances are, if you’re diving into the Toy Box or Words sections, you want to know what’s in them without having to scroll through all the pages.
Behold.
Two hyperlinked lists to make your Chintz navigation life easier: the Toy Box Index and the Words Index. Continue reading
This shot is actually one from the Chintz Curtain archives. It was part of a series of clit clip pics that Lizzie and I took for her C is for clitoris, C is for clip post last year.
We didn’t end up using this image in the end (I think the one that headed Liz’s review is the better of the two) but I still like it a lot. (The rosebud made a rather good stand-in for a real-life clitoris and labia!) Continue reading
Image: Evolved Bendable Silicone Rose Vibrator, courtesy of Vibrator Kingdom
A Hallmark card with a schmaltzy message. Flowers. Chocolate. Jewellery.
Yawn.
I’m in two minds about Valentine’s Day. On the one hand, I think it’s great to tell and show your partner that you love and appreciate them. On the other, I’m not that keen on being railroaded into buying a load of sentimental tat for a day that has, over the years, become less about romance and more about commerce.
The numbers are staggering. According to History.com, men, on average, open their wallets to the tune of USD $150.00. Women? USD $75.00. The amount of chocolate sold? 58 million pounds worth. And that’s just the tip of the iceberg. Take a look at this Valentine’s Day by the numbers meme they put together.
What a long, long way from Lupercalia – the Roman pagan festival many believe to be the origin of the modern Valentine’s Day celebrations – we’ve come. No blatant nudity or gentle flogging with thongs these days (more’s the pity). Just lots of cardboard, slowly wilting vegetation, sugar, and hearts on chains.
My proposal for this Valentine’s Day? Don’t go crazy on the cash. Keep the fun, sex, and debauchery of the original Lupercalian festival (sans the animal sacrifices) front and centre.
No idea where to begin looking for a lusty present? Some ‘starters for ten’ … Continue reading
What we used: Rattan cane
From: Bondara
Price: £16.99
Material(s): Rattan (cane), leather (handle)
*Important: Canes can hurt in bad ways as well as good ways! If you haven’t already, please do take the time to read the Behind the Chintz Curtain Disclaimer before delving further into this post.
First thoughts …
Lizzie
Excitement and dread.
It’s fair to say that Thomas and I have been on a bit of a journey these past few years with impact instruments; first hands, then paddles, then floggers, then straps, then crops, and now, finally, a cane. We’d been discussing the idea of trying one for a while but had been gradually building up as we knew from all the research we’d done on them (and from playing with our other impact toys) that the pain level would likely be quite a jump. Additionally, because of their greater length, there was the worry that a cane would be trickier to control.
In the end, it was Thomas who took the bull by the horns and ordered it – I was too chicken! Continue reading
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