GAMES

Sex games. More specifically, sex board games. Have you played one? Would you like to play one?

Things have come a long way since spin-the-bottle and strip poker – although that’s not to say that those aren’t still great fun – and Lovehoney U.K., Lovehoney U.S. and Lovehoney Australia are all currently running ‘three for*’ promotions, which include a selection of sex-focussed board games for couples and groups. NB: there are other items in this offer as well, such as dildos and vibrators, so don’t just have to purchase games to take advantage of it.

Monogamy: A Hot Affair Game

“Perfect for a naughty night in or a boring Sunday afternoon, Monogamy is the game to spice things up between you and your partner, encouraging you to try new things together and reignite the passion you felt the first time you set eyes on each other.

With over 400 ideas at three levels of play, you can make this best-selling game as sweet or as sexy as you want.”

Buy links:

• Lovehoney U.K.
• Lovehoney U.S. 
• Lovehoney Australia

Tie & Tease Sex Game for Couples

“Using the die to work your way around the Tie & Tease board, travel through a range of bondage and S&M fantasies, including light spanking, blindfold play, bondage and more. With an hour’s worth of playing ahead of you, get ready for some serious stimulation!”

Buy links:

• Lovehoney U.K.
• Lovehoney U.S.
• Lovehoney Australia

Tease Naughty Board Game for Couples and Groups

“Combining a classic party game with sexy features and scenarios, Tease is an erotic board game for both devoted couples wanting to experiment and for swinging parties. Suitable for 2 – 6 players with a choice of 3 different experiences to explore.”

Buy links:

• Lovehoney U.K.
• Lovehoney U.S.
• Lovehoney Australia

*Please note that the ‘three for’ amount vary by currency and are listed on the various Lovehoney sites at the time of writing as follows:

• U.K. – ‘Three for £50.00’
• U.S.A. – ‘Three for $75.00’
• Australia – ‘Three for $75.00’

EBOOKS

Title: Her Mad Hatter
Author: Marie Hall.

“Alice is all grown up. Running the Mad Hatter’s Cupcakery and Tea Shoppe is a delicious job, until fate–and a fairy godmother with a weakness for bad boys–throws her a curveball. Now, Alice is the newest resident of Wonderland, where the Mad Hatter fuels her fantasies and thrills her body with his dark touch.

The Mad Hatter may have a voice and a body made for sex, but he takes no lovers. Ever. But a determined fairy godmother has forced Alice into Wonderland–and his arms. Now, as desire and madness converge, the Hatter must decide if he will fight the fairy godmother’s mating–or fight for Alice.

Long length Novella ~ Approx. 40k words. Additional pages are sneak peeks to future books!

This is not erotica, just a good old fashioned romance.”

This sounds thoroughly intriguing and has over seven hundred reviews (most of them positive). Best of all, it’s currently free, free, free. Clickety-click.

Buy links:

• Amazon U.S. – Her Mad Hatter
• Amazon U.K. – Her Mad Hatter 

LINGERIE

Bargains abound! Agent Provocateur and Coco de Mer are both having their seasonal sales. I love sexy lingerie but this is about the only time of the year I can afford to buy it from either of them. Some of the bigger ticket items, such as AP’s corsets, are still eye-wateringly expensive, but there are some excellent kicker and bra bargains to be had.

• Agent Provocateur Sale
• Coco de Mer Sale

Happy shopping.

Jane
xxx

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Make Me: Twelve Tales of Dark Desire

Image: courtesy of Cari Silverwood and Skye Warren.

It’s no secret that I am a huge (huge) fan of dark erotica, so I cannot shout loudly enough about Make Me, a brilliant collection of popular stories that’s been put together by some of the genre’s stand-out authors. C.J. Roberts, Annabel Joseph, Skye Warren, Cari Silverwood, Claire Thompson … the contributor list for this thing reads like a who’s who of the smut writing world.

You get twelve full-length novels for what you’d roughly pay for a single eBook (£1.85 if you’re in the U.K. or $3.58 if you’re in the U.S.) and the collection is comprised of titles that have already proven to be extremely popular with readers in their own right. Don’t believe me? Check out the ratings for the individual books on Amazon and Goodreads. Basically, you’re getting the good stuff. Non-con, dark smutty heaven.

The catch? This is a March-only deal so you need to download the Make Me collection (purchase links below) before the 31^st. Go forth and find your mind’s dark alleyway!

Amazon.co.uk

• Make Me – Kindle

Amazon.com

• Make Me – Kindle

Oh, Liana I love you!

Not a discount alert but a ‘new season’ alert. The folk over at Lascivious, who make seriously sexy lingerie, got in touch to let me know that their Spring/Summer collection for 2014 is now available. I’ve got a few things from Lascivious in my cupboard and the workmanship and design of their pieces really is outstanding – hence the reason they’re included on the Chintz ‘Retail Therapy’ list over there on the right-hand side. Not only that, they actually have things that suit those of the small-breasted persuasion, such as myself. (As evidenced by my recent Sinful Sunday image, I’m no Dolly Parton but that doesn’t mean I don’t want to look sexy, dammit!) So it is with much covetous lust that I highlight this new creation of theirs, the Liana Long Suspender. *Sigh* Isn’t it beautiful?

 Image: courtesy of Lascivious.

MyStim Electrosex Lust Egg

Another item I’d like to get my sticky paws on – what a shocker! (Pun intended.) Given my growing interest in all things electrical (okay, may not all things – I have my limits (put that cattle prod down, M!)), this little egg was bound to catch my eye. It’s made of polished, medical aluminium, which means that in addition to providing little electrical vibes, it can be heated and cooled for temperature play. Bondara currently have the MyStim Electrosex Lust Egg down from £64.99 to £49.99 however you need to use it in conjunction with either the MyStim Pure Vibes Electrosex Tens Unit (£84.99) or the MyStim Tension Lover Electrosex Tens Unit (£114.99).

Food for thought if you’re a bit bored with standard vibrator sensations and want something a little different.

Have a great weekend everyone. And to all those attending Eroticon 2014: laugh lots, learn loads, be inspired, and enjoy the hell out of your smutty selves!

Jane
xxx

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EBOOKS

*The following books were listed as free at the time of this post’s publication. Please double-check that that’s still the case before you hit the download button.

Beg – C.D. Reiss

• Amazon.co.uk – Kindle
• Amazon.com – Kindle

‘If you loved Fifty Shades of Grey or Sylvia Day’s Crossfire series, you’ll love BEG – book one in Songs of Submission…’

In all honesty, that strapline puts me off wanting to download this one (anti-marketing!), but the ratings appear to be pretty solid (most are between three and five stars). I rather like the cover, too.

My name is Monica. I’m a singer born and raised in Los Angeles.

I’ve stopped dating. When I cut a record, or win a Grammy, maybe then I’ll be with someone, but every man in my past has done everything he could to make me submit myself to him, and it’s gotten in the way of my career. I won’t do it again.

But there’s Jonathan. He owns the high-rise hotel where I work, and he is gorgeous and charming. I refuse to fall in love with him, even though when he asks me to submit to him, I want nothing more.

Tempt Me – Isabel Morin

• Amazon.co.uk – Kindle
• Amazon.com – Kindle

A novella that’s likely to push your buttons if you’re after something quick and sexy. Nothing too controversial or challenging. Just good old erotic romance.

Nina Valentine is done with New York. After spending the last year struggling to make it as a painter, all she has to show for it are bills she can’t pay. Out of money and sick of struggling, she decides it’s time to pack it up and head back to her hometown in New Hampshire.

When she meets Ian Sinclair at her going away party, Nina’s instantly attracted to his dark, smoldering looks and lean athletic body. When he asks her back to his apartment, she’s willing to overlook the fact that he’s a high-powered lawyer. It’s just for one night, and guys as gorgeous as Ian don’t come around every day.

Ian has never had a problem getting women into his bed, but after his hot night with Nina, all he wants is more of her. So he makes the curvy painter a deal – stay in the city for a few weeks and he’ll take care of everything.

Nina agrees, even though she knows better than to get attached. He’s a rich corporate suit, she’s a struggling artist. But as the connection between them deepens and Ian takes her to places she’s never been – both in and out of the bedroom – Nina doesn’t know how much longer she can resist.

Deadly Offerings – Alexa Grace

• Amazon.co.uk – Kindle
• Amazon.com – Kindle

Romantic suspense, which is a category I quite enjoy if the story is cleverly executed. This one does sound quite promising – reading the various reviews it seems that it has a quite a broad appeal.

Deadly Offerings is an ebook with a blend of pulsing passion and razor-sharp suspense. It is the first adventure in this sizzling romantic suspense trilogy.

Anne Mason thinks she’ll be safe living in the Midwest building a wind farm. She may be dead wrong. Someone is dumping bodies in her corn field and telling Anne they are gifts—for her!

As the body count rises, Anne realizes a cold-blooded serial killer is patiently waiting and watching her every move. And he won’t stop until he ends her life. It is clear there are no limits to this killer’s thirst for revenge or how far he will go to get it.

After a nasty divorce, Anne Mason does not want to get romantically involved, especially with ex-husband’s attorney, Michael Brandt.

The ruggedly handsome new County Prosecutor is the last person Anne can trust, but may offer her only chance at survival from a psychopathic killer. But will she survive the passion that rages between them?

TOYS

Lovehoney 
Yet another sale from the U.K. sex toy powerhouse with various price categories: £3.00, £5.00, £10.00 and £20.00. (There are some good silicone dildo/vibrator options in the latter band.)

Myla
Have taken up to 70% off selected underwear/lingerie. There are some gorgeous peek-a-boo bras in this line-up, so if you’re after sexy underthings at a serious discount, this is a sale you should definitely investigate.

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TOYS AND LINGERIE

Agent Provocateur
AP is one of my favourite, favourite under-thing brands but at full-price their stuff, while beautiful, is death on the old wallet. This is definitely the time to buy. These corset-style Ilya Big Briefs? Reduced from £110 to £55.  This Mercy Waspie? £185 to £95. These Syble tie-side knickers (similar to the ones I wore in my Sinful Sunday pic a while back)? Reduced to £35 from £65.

Coco de Mer
Is offering up to 50% off selected items, including lingerie, bondage/fetish wear and sex toys. There are some beautiful, beautiful items in this sale, including FYI’s Binding Briefs (£64.00), the Coco de Mer Jade Petite Rosebud Small Butt Plug (£60.00), the DL & Co Lady Rhubarb Ombre Collection Scented Candle (£32.00) and this beautiful Crystal Flogger from Bo’s Tit Bits (£98.00).

Figleaves
Loads and loads of sizes and styles to choose from in this one. The Midnight Grace underwired smoothing slip is now £32. £6.40 for a pair of Butterfly Blue flirty frill ruffle mesh shorts (very cute cut at the rear!) Elle MacPherson Intimates Desert Heat Torsolette? Reduced from £75 to £45.

EBOOKS

As ever, the following books were listed as free at the time of this post’s publication. Please double-check that that’s still the case before you hit the download button.

Secret Story Time: More Filthy Fantasies – Jason Jaxx

• Amazon.co.uk
• Amazon.com 

Threesomes, spanking and fantasy. Absolutely no idea what the writing is like in this one but the ratings seem to be positive.

‘A compilation of erotic tales, packed with sizzling, unrelenting, graphic action. Explicit erotica designed for providing pleasure featuring threesomes, spanking, fantasy, and enough hot sex to satisfy a variety of tastes.’

A Bit of Bite – Cynthia Eden

• Kobo ePub 

Paranormal romance rather than erotica but Cynthia Eden is a popular author so I suspect that the quality of the writing in this short (it’s 11,000 words long) will be half-way decent.

‘A killer is stalking the streets of Crossroads, Mississippi, and it’s up to Sheriff Ava Dushaine to stop him. But when suspicion falls on werewolf alpha Julian Kasey—Ava’s ex-lover and the man who still haunts her dreams—Ava knows that she’ll either have to prove his innocence…or watch the whole town go up in flames.’

The Business of Pleasure – Justine Elyot

• Amazon.co.uk
• Amazon.com 

I’ve read this one before and can thoroughly, thoroughly recommend it. The writing is excellent and the sexual encounters in it are hot, hot, hot. Make sure you have some, er, relief handy.

‘If one call could set you on a trail to the heart of your darkest fantasy, would you make it? Charlotte does, and her bold decision propels her into a world where no desire is too outrageous, decadent or extravagant to be satisfied, for a price. Her own fantasy life merges with reality when she is hired to work for the shadowy organisation she first encountered as a client. She organises an array of wild set pieces involving banquets, film productions, mansions full of pleasure slaves, as well as thoroughly researching those requests that chime with her own kinky tastes. Two men, one woman, and every sexual fantasy imaginable, these are the ingredients that make up the business of pleasure.’

Wishing you all a wonderful, sexy weekend.

Jane xxx

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This photograph was a happy accident. It’s from the Working Girl sequence I did for the Sinful Sunday competition a few weeks back (some of you may recognise the lingerie) and I was playing around with downwards-looking shots. In the end, I decided that it didn’t communicate the film’s title clearly enough, so pushed it to the side.

I was actually wearing a fake fur coat over my stockings and knickers during that snapping session and I think the reason I like this image is that you can see a hint of its texture. The coat in question has been hanging in my wardrobe since I was 20 (my OH calls it my ‘Tickle Me Elmo’ coat) and I love it as much now as the day I bought it. It’s very warm (I’m someone who tends to feel the cold!), the fur is thick and lush (it feels amazing against bare skin), and I often find myself stroking it when I’m wearing it. What can I say? I’m a tactile girl.

Who else is joining in with Sinful Sunday? Click on the banner below to find out.

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I’m not sure that I can fully express how much I love pants (sorry – I just can’t bring myself to call them ‘panties’; as a Brit-Antipodean hybrid, that word always makes me giggle) but given that I’m someone who’s a tad – okay, a lot – lacking in the chest department, they’re the one item of lingerie that I know I can really go to town with. There’s no worrying about how I’m going to go about filling them out, no stressing about how ridiculously over-padded they might look, no wondering if I’m going to end up with two underwires swinging around my neck the moment I lift my arms in the air. In short, they’re my trump card when I take my clothes off.

My love of knickers started pretty early on; my mum has always maintained the most amazing pants drawer and her love of sexy lingerie has rubbed off well and good. Her motto? ‘You can’t wear bad underwear. What if you get hit by a bus?’ Seems rather random, I know, but her point is that you want to be looking your best if you end up in a situation that requires you to divest yourself of clothing unexpectedly.

I hate to think how much I’ve spent on pants over the years. Before I had kids – and thus had two shiny pennies to rub together (oh, and time to handwash rather than throwing anything and everything into the washing machine) – I used to fork over ridiculous sums on bits of silk, satin and lace. However, these days, with less disposable income and a washing mound the size of Vesuvius, I have to be a little more restrained and discerning. Now I have an everyday pile (still nice, but can be washed mechanically with regular detergent) and an ‘other’ pile. Okay, a kinky pile. Actually, a box. And this is my little treasure chest of treats. Although I pilfer it regularly enough, there is nothing better than when my OH goes into said box (no pun intended) and lays out a little morsel on the bed for me to wear. When he does that, it’s a very clear signal to me that we’re shifting into ‘play’ mode.

Standing in front of someone in a pair of provocative kickers and nothing else. Being told to take them off or having them stripped from you. Leaving them at mid-thigh or tangled around your ankles during sex. No piece of clothing that I can think of has the ability to make me feel sexier.

Our respective favourites? Well …

His are these tie-sided lovelies – easy to remove and they have a see-through back (the perv!):

Mine are the ouverts pictured in the title image.

And we both rather like these ones, which are at once kinky and amusing. (You need a Hollywood to wear them successfully, though. These are definitely not a ‘between waxes’ option!):

Who else has a thing for knickers? Click on the Kink of the Week banner below to find out.

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Image: Origami Love Hearts by Gnomes (own work)

It’s Valentine’s Day. And you know what that means, don’t you?

Chocolate?

No.

Flowers?

No.

Schmultzy cards?

No! It means I can announce the winner of the Madame Liberty Pleasure State lingerie giveaway! And the name of the lucky person?

(drumroll)

RYLAND C.

Yay! Congratulations! I’ll be in touch via email within the next day to sort sizing and delivery.

Thank you to everyone who took the time to enter (I particularly enjoyed reading all the amusing messages asking for the girl to be included in the giveaway :-)) and, of course, to Madame Liberty for providing such a lovely prize.

Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone. x

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Every girl needs some pretty underwear. Even if no one else sees the lacy delights beneath your clothes, wearing a beautiful bra or a pair of knockout knickers just makes you feel that much more confident and sexy. (Well, it does me, anyway. Especially when, on the outside, I look as if I’ve been dragged through a bush backwards after chasing two small, devious children around.) And if you do have someone to show them off to? All the better.

So, to celebrate Valentine’s Day (it’s a week today, in case you’ve forgotten), the team over at Madame Liberty have given me a set of very sexy and beautiful lingerie from their Pleasure State range to bestow upon one lucky Behind the Chintz Curtain visitor.

And here are the two delicious pieces you could win:

Pleasure State – Spice Bazaar Bra

Pleasure State – Spice Bazaar Thong

(Just to be clear, only the lingerie is included in this giveaway. If you’ve got your eye on the model, the Persian rug or the papaya in the post title image, you’re out of luck.)

This competition is open to EVERYONE, no matter where you live, as Madame Liberty will ship worldwide. (Aren’t they nice?) All you have to do is email me and put ‘ML Competition’ in the subject line. Don’t forget to include your name in the message so that I can identify you.

I’ll be picking the winner next Thursday (that’s 14 February) at 12.00pm GMT.

Good luck!

*PLEASE NOTE THAT THIS GIVEAWAY HAS NOW ENDED.

Madame Liberty
Web: www.madameliberty.com
Facebook: www.facebook.com/MadameLiberty
Twitter: @Liberty_Madame

*Behind the Chintz Curtain is not being compensated for this giveaway.

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This Christmas, we have a full house. I’m even having to borrow a trestle table to fit everyone in for Christmas lunch. It’s going to be awesome. Lots of chatter, over-excited kids, plenty of Buck’s Fizz, good food and good conversation.

But once everyone’s gone home, the mess is cleaned up, and the small ones are fast asleep, I’ll be opening a few sexy presents with my OH, just the two of us. And I’m very much hoping that I’ll receive one or two things from my Christmas wishlist …

• Red Passionate Birthday Suit Suspenders from Agent Provocateur (those red ribbons are to die for – seasonal, too!)
• Lux-Me White Swarovski Crystal Riding Crop from La Belle Epoque (sparkly things are always welcome)
• Jimmyjane Afterglow Massage Candle in Grapefruit from Lovehoney (an excuse to touch each other – not that we need one)
• Kitty Gold Ouvert backless knickers from Lascivious (easy access and very, very pretty to look at)
• YESforLOV Intimate Pleasure Caress After Spanking Cream from Coco de Mer (no explanation needed)
  

And lest you think I’m completely self-indulged, rest assured that I’m on the lookout for sexy presents for my husband, too. He’s actually quite hard to buy for, but I’ve found a few goodies I think he might like …

• Truth or Dare – A Game of Passion from Amazon (an interesting alternative to Risk)
• Luxury Soft Black Bondage Rope from Bondara (since I used his good one to do the Shibari Christmas Turkey shot for Toy with me Tuesday)
• Maximus Anal Lubricant from Lovehoney (to go with the Kitty Gold Ouvert knickers above)
• Godiva Deeply Dark Chocolate Collection from John Lewis (my OH adores chocolate)

Cross your fingers for me!

Hope your Christmas shopping is going well.

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Gorgeous knickers, waspies, bras, suspenders, playsuits and nightwear at a serious discount. When I looked this morning, some of the items in the sale now have more than 50% off – and you can shop by price, too:
£50 and under
£100 and under
£150 and under

I adore AP and whenever my bank account allows it, love to have a little splurge with them, so this sale is the equivalent of waving a pair of red pants at a bull with a lingerie fetish. It has been going on for over a week now, though, so you’ll need to move fast if you’re planning on bagging a bargain.

For those that aren’t familiar with this super-sexy lingerie brand (which was co-founded by the son of British fashion designer Vivienne Westwood back in 1994) this will give you an idea of the kind of the kind of beautiful underwear they make. (Yes, I know it’s not Valentine’s Day but this clip flat-out rocks, so I’m sharing it anyway!)

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